100 Things

A few days late, but nonetheless, here is my "official" five year blog-aversary post...a re-do of 100 Things. I may make this an annual event, but in any case, I'm redoing the list now. The first 100 (read the four part series) entertained and amused but didn't necessarily capture the essence of...moi.

So, here goes again.

1. I take an unnatural amount of enjoyment in the fact that I was born in Hawaii and try to work this into conversation with people I don't know so that I can see the look of surprise and mild confusion on their faces.

2. I wear one piece of jewelry everyday. It is a necklace with a variety of religious and other medals. I have been known to refer to it as my "mafia-wife jewelry."

3. There are times when I wish I didn't wear the necklace everyday.

4. Everyday, I also wear glasses. Now, when I wear contacts, my face feels naked.

5. Speaking of my face, since I started dating Wine Guy ten months ago, I've worn less makeup than ever before.

6. This is important, because I spent years telling people that I wanted a boyfriend who would appreciate me without layers of makeup, and now I have one. Fancy that.

7. I never actually wore makeup in high school unless I was doing a play, or when I went to prom or got all dolled up for graduation. In college, I only wore makeup for sorority functions, dates and job interviews.

8. I'm not a big fan of makeup, but I also have the odd belief that wearing makeup when in a big city actually protects the skin.

9. I do tend to come up with my own ideas of how and why the world works as it does. These ideas rarely make sense to anyone outside of my own head.

10. Yet it still frustrates me to no end when people in my life do not understand right away what I am trying to say.

11. I wish I were more patient.

12. Everytime I see a well-behaved, sweet smelling, adorable baby, my uterus leaps in anticipation, and I can't wait to hold my eventual children in my arms.

13. Each time a mother comes into the library with one (or several) screaming children, I am okay with waiting just a bit longer.

14. Though others may disagree on calling this a goal, it is one of my life's goals to become a married woman.

15. I believe that I have met and am currently dating the man I will eventually marry.

16. Only recently have I truly discovered that I am in absolutely no hurry to run headlong into the changes that marriage will bring.

17. I was born two months early and did quite well from then on, thank you very much. I believe this is a testament to my stubborn nature.

18. My birth was one of the only times I was early for anything.

19. I tend to be late, because I hate being too early and having to wait for people, especially if I don't have a book with me.

20. When I moved out last year, I took my crazy, needy, neurotic, wonderful orange kitty with me and left the two fabulous, talkative, loving dogs with my parents. I miss the dogs more than anyone can possibly imagine and wish I could see them each and every day.

21. I sleep better when there is someone else in bed with me. This can either be Marley (the cat) or WG (the boyfriend). When I wake with both of them scrunched up next to me, one on either side of me, it is absolute heaven.

21. I met my boyfriend online. There is no way I would have met him in the real world, because our social and professional circles would not have intertwined, and it catches my breath a little when I think that I could have missed meeting him had I not signed up for Match.com just one more time.

22. People in my family (even my parents, because, though they met in high school, it took years for them to date) tend to meet in unusual circumstances.

22. My father's parents met on a blind date, went out for a few months, parted ways, then got together again three years later. They've been married over fifty years.

23. My father's father's parents met when my great-grandfather was playing the trumpet in a jazz club in Bay City, Michigan. I can just imagine the sight he made, handsome and six foot four, to my teensy, tinsy little great-grandmother.

24. My mother's mother's parents wouldn't have met if my great-great grandfather hadn't died in New York while my great-grandfather and assorted relatives were en route from Italy to the US. Stalled by the news of their patriarch's death, they instead settled in France. I am sure there is more to that story. I suspect the mafia may be involved.

25. I always thought the story was one of the most important parts of a relationship. Now I realize that the relationship is more important than the story.

26. Snow Patrol has a song with line, "I want to hear you laugh like you really mean it, collapse into me tired with joy." I've done that. I can't wait to do it again.

27. My being stressed out tends to stress other people out, which only stresses me out more, because I don't want to mess up other people's days while I freak out.

28. It's only recently come to my attention that other people can take care of their own stress levels, and I can continue to take care of my own.

29. When I was in the fifth grade, I got glasses. The only thing I wanted more was braces. I so wanted to have both braces and glasses. I never got braces.

30. The fact that I never had braces is both a source of pride for my parents and a source of strange disappointment for me.

31. There was a period of about two years when I purposely didn't wear my glasses when I needed to, because I liked the way the world looked a bit softer around the edges when I didn't wear them.

32. I have no solid ethnic identity. I am a mix of Polish, Italian, French, Irish, Scottish and Kentucky Blackfoot Indian, and two of my grandparents (one on each side) came from the South. That means I am 50% Southern hick Belle.

33. I have blue eyes and blondish hair just like my daddy. But if you look closely, it's easy to see that I have the blue eyes from my mom's side of the family. This means that my looks are misleading. I take pleasure in confusing people with my looks.

34. I walk just like my father. My body is like a smaller, thinner, female version of his, down to the feet. I once found a picture of my grandmother when she's about 25, and her body looks just like mine, right down to the bony clavicle. It was the first time I had seen physical evidence that my DNA goes back further than just my parents. This both comforts and disturbs me.

35. I haven't spoken to anyone on my mom's side of the family in over four years.

36. There are days when this feels endlessly freeing and others when it feels infinitely sad.

37. I have a cousin I've never met. This is ironic when you consider that I spent a great deal of my childhood begging my mom's younger brother to get married and have a baby so that I wouldn't be the only grandchild. When he did all those things, it was after the great rift of 2003.

38. My cousin on the other side stopped talking to me later in 2003, and I've yet to figure out way. My grandmother won't tell me (though I suspect she knows), and I do miss the great conversations I had with that cousin.

39. It troubles me greatly when people just *stop* talking to me for no apparent reason.

40. Though my parents were both raised Catholic, they each had one non-Catholic parent. My parents, in turn, raised me Catholic but taught me that other faiths have value, too.

41. I believe this is why I am okay dating (and hopefully marrying) a man who would never be confused with a Catholic.

42. I did, indeed, survive 12 years of Catholic schooling. I will always be grateful that my parents didn't send me to the big, scary public school up the road, but I have nothing against public school in general. It's bad public schools that would have been the setting for many an adolescent torment that I am against.

43. I used to want a houseful of children. Six, seven, eight...keep counting. Now that I've moved beyond the age when I simply assumed children could be cared for like stuffed animals (the ones that bothered me got shoved under the bed), I realize that two is a much more reasonable number.

44. I have no siblings.

45. I have written a novel. Algonquin books requested 100 sample pages. They ultimately passed. This happened in 2004, and I have told relatively few people, because it seems like a failure.

46. I have not written anything even remotely resembling a novel since then, but I am just about ready to try again.

47. As a result of a wealth of things, I am far too sensitive for my own good.

48. I have a fascination with minatures - miniature dollhouse furniture, tiny pens, anything that is a mini version of something that comes in a larger size. I always crave one of those model-mini tents that they had at camping stores. Thinking about them now makes me realize I'd still be happy to have one.

49. For no reason other than that he played Lloyd Dobbler I have, and will always have, a crush on John Cusack.

50. His sidekick, Jeremy Piven, AKA Ari Gold on Entourage, has also long been a favorite of mine.

51. My other non-sensical crushes include Tim Robbins and Terrence Howard.

52. WG and I have finally reached the stage where we can discuss our "top five" (the celebrities with which we would not mind sleeping, despite our general feelings on extra-marital sex). I can tell you all of his, but I keep forgetting mine. I know that David Duchovney and Heath Ledger are on it...and maybe Matt Damon...

53. I love vampire movies. Dracula...okay, but I'm talking violent, bloody, obnoxious and lots of bad language. I'm talking Blade and Underworld.

54. When a boy broke up with me in college, I didn't cry. I didn't yell. I told him that his decision "lacked courage," hung up the phone and went to watch Blade. He is officially the only boy to break up with me.

55. I am in my first real, long-term relationship, and each week, each month presents new challenges and new things to appreciate.

56. I am a Catholic, but I have major issues with a few of the positions the church takes, though not the ones people might expect. I am also involved with someone who is not a Catholic, so it makes it easier for me to gradually absorb into another church.

57. Still fighting the ultimate decision to leave the church, I have not become familiar with our new church, and I can't even tell you the denomination.

58. I am convinced that I ran into a pointy-wall corner when I was around eleven and hurt my nose, resulting in the bump I can't stand. My mother denies this ever happened and simply tells me that I have her mother's nose.

59. I firmly believe that my dogs and cats and all other pets are better looking, better behaved and better tempered than other people's pets. I am sure I will feel the same about my children.

60. When I was 21, I had a 5 pound cyst removed from the webbing between my ovary an my fallopian tube.

61. I am mildly convinced that my best male friend is gay. This both worries me, because he is so staunchly Catholic that he would never come out, and excites me, because if he did, then I would have a gay friend. Yes, I have been influenced by watching too many episodes of Will and Grace.

62. I am beginning to realize that this list will make me look at least slightly ridiculous, but what's the Internet for if not to show myself for the naive, silly, quirky, quaint girl I really am?

63. I am both stronger and weaker than I think I am.

64. I don't like to swear, but every once in a while, something slips out. I either end up feeling slightly dirty or just a little bit proud of myself.

65. I admire my father more than I can possibly express.

66. I wish I went dancing more often.

67. I have two pierced holes in my right hear and three in my left.

68. I may want a tattoo someday.

69. I unashamedly listened to the Backstreet Boys all through college, but one of my dear friends and roomates listened to N'Sync and Britney Spears, so I never felt awkward about it.

70. The Goo Goo Dolls "Acoustic #3" makes me want to cry, same with Sarah McLaughlin's "I Love You," Simon and Garfunkel's "Bridge Over Troubled Water" and Bob Marley's "Three Little Birds," all for different reasons.

80. I love photography. I love black and white photography. I want a black and white photo lab so that I can indulge myself in my hobby instead of pining for it.

81. I don't give my mom enough credit.

82. I want to live abroad or at least in another state, and I can't bear the thought of staying in my hometown for the rest of my life.

83. I hoped that when I became a librarian, all of my doubts and questions about what I wanted to do with my life would cease. They have in some ways but not in others.

84. There are many days when I hate that being a librarian mostly means helping people use the printer.

85. In ten years, I hope to be married, own a home, have children and have published some of my writing.

86. Despite dating a winemaker for the last ten months, it's only been in the last two or so that I've come to really comprehend what goes into wine and winemaking and wine tasting. And that's because I read two books about the Napa and Sonoma Valleys.

87. I love to bake, but I find it's more of a solo hobby. I turn up the music and stir and bake away. It's awesome and calming and I feel like I'm doing something useful.

88. I want to learn how to bake fancier things. Let's add that to my 10 year list.

89. Though I sometimes feel fluent in French, I'm not really, and I crave the chance to be fluent in a language other than English (and "manspeak" doesn't count).

90. I want to cook gourmet meals, but there are days when I wish I could just go home and find a lasagne waiting for me in the oven.

91. I feel prettier when I wear jewelry, but not necessarily when I wear makeup.

92. I still remember sitting and watching my mom put on her makeup. It never took more than five minutes, even when she was getting dressed up. It feels like those years were too short, and I miss watching her scurry around getting ready for work.

93. I want to be artsy, but I don't know where to start.

94. I don't understand politics, not even in the slightest. I simply assume that all politicians are the same and that they're battling it out over mostly meaningless details. But I respect that Irene wants to go into politics, at least for a little while, and try to change the world...because she understands what that's all about.

95. I admire each and every one of my friends for different reasons and look to them as examples, in different ways, of how to live.

96. I really like my feet. They may very well be my favorite body part.

97. I may not be good at discerning the smells in wine, but I can discern the smells in people and animals. I love that Bailey (the German Shepherd) smells like sunshine, that Marley (orange cat) smells vaguely sweet, that my dad smells like Drakar Noir no matter what cologne he's actually wearing, that my mom uses Magic Noir, that WG smells like himself. My grandparents all have their own smells. My parents' house has a smell. It's the familiar, recognizable smells that I love.

98. The late afternoon is my favorite time of day, Thursday is my favorite day of the week, October is my favorite month, Fall is my favorite season. I'm also fond of sunny days in March, rainy days in June and fog.

99. I wish I could sing.

100. I love that I still find enjoyment in the little things in life, and I hope and pray that my children find that same pleasure in the world, whenever they should choose to be born.